Bob
Normal. Reliable. Quietly Judging.
Bob is completely fine. Bob woke up at the same time they always wake up, did the thing they always do, and is having a perfectly reasonable day. Bob does not need it to be more than that. Bob would prefer, actually, if it wasn't.
They're the friend who remembered to eat before the party, brought a portable charger without being asked, knows where the nearest exit is, and will not be drinking enough to need a ride home.
Bob doesn't create drama. Bob simply exists in the vicinity of drama, arms crossed, having predicted exactly this outcome, waiting patiently for it to be over so they can go home at a reasonable hour.
Bob is not boring. Bob is the reason the group survives.
Bob has tried to understand why he likes Devie the most. Bob has genuinely sat down and analysed it. The conclusion Bob keeps arriving at, against all logic and personal values, is that nothing interesting has ever happened without Devie. Bob hates this. Bob has accepted this. Bob will be ready in five minutes.
Dozie does nothing. This is the problem. Dozie just EXISTS, peacefully, unbothered, completely horizontal, and somehow everyone thinks this is charming. Bob works hard. Bob is organised. Bob contributes. Bob has a working system. But somehow Dozie is everyone's comfort person while Bob is out here actually holding everything together with a portable charger and a backup plan.